Sunday, November 27, 2011
This word is Hopi for "Unbalanced Life".
It can mean you have too much of any one thing in your life. Too much work, too much stress, too much exercise, too much alcohol. It especially can mean too much mental processing on one topic or another (money for example). Paradoxically, sometimes we need to unplug to re-charge.
Right now for me "Balance" has meant more down time, not so much 'body in motion', but more importantly, dropping the sense of urgency to do do do go go go.
So I have had a few weeks off of running and traveling. Just running when I feel like it, and not having to travel too much for work has certainly helped too.
Next week I leave for San Fransisco, and some deep woods walking in the John Muir woods, and the Point Reyes National Sea Shore.
Will I RUN? Maybe.
More importantly, this trip is about being there. Seeing the giant redwoods, and the pacific ocean. I really am enjoying the calmness right now, and I'd like to keep that sense on this trip.
How much balance do you have in your life?
Friday, November 25, 2011
How many of our life experiences (both those we witness as external events, and more importantly those that are products of our perceptions and emotions) are colored by both our cognitive and emotional biases and our lack of understanding of the physical world?
Memories. As time goes on, memories of an event change. In fact, as we recall a memory, we are not even recalling the original event. We are recalling the last memory we had of the event. A memory of a memory of a memory.
What does time and replaying do to that?
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Monday, November 21, 2011
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Feb 25: Birkebiener 50K Classic Ski Race, Hayward WI
Friday, November 18, 2011
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Feb 25: Birkebiener 50K Classic Ski Race, Hayward WI
Sunday, November 13, 2011
In my last post, I spoke about empathy and the belief in a higher, supernatural power.
My plan is to not write about it again here, for a time. Instead, I will devote myself to the understanding of Christianity point of view, so as to better frame my position. I'll start by reading "Mere Christianity" (CS Lewis), and "Evidence that Demands a Verdict" (Josh McDowell).
I hope that those who profess a faith in Christianity will do likewise, and read the following:
Why I Believed: Reflections of a Former Missionary (Ken Daniels)
The Origins of Christianity and the Quest for the Historical Jesus Christ
I've disabled comments once again here.
I wrote this up, without having researched it first. Once I started looking around I found I had essentially re-created the Cosmological argument. I have some difference, but the likeness is interesting. My Notes and comments are of my own doing. These combine many different disciplines and influences from my reading. They are however, still my own thoughts and musings.
---------Argument starts here---------
Observation: “Objects” or “Effects” appear to exist separate from the “Object” I call myself. I say “appear” because technically speaking, I can’t prove that. There is a whole school of thought around the concept of “Adviata”, and is too much for this discussion. For the purpose of this discussion, I will take it as a given that “Objects” or “Effects” happen outside and independent of the “Object” called “me”, the observer. The appearance of separation and the separation are considered equal.
Observation: Every “Object” or “Effect” seems to have an underlying cause. IE: If A moves or is created, it is because B moved or created it, and B was moved or created by C, etc, until we get back to the ORIGINAL CAUSE.
Deduced: Therefore, there must have been an ORIGINAL CAUSE which started the chain of events leading to everything’s existence.
Inferred, from most major religions: the ORIGINAL CAUSE is a supreme, supernatural (read: outside of nature) being who has an interest in what we do, and made us in his likeness and image.
--------Argument ends here--------------
Comments: Why do we infer this? We think about the logic that takes us back to a beginning cause; is the idea that the creator made us in his image just anthropomorphic? Why wouldn’t it be a whale, or an invisible pink unicorn?
We are complex enough to believe that we must have a reason for existing. We are self aware; within our puny brains we believe we have ‘heard’ the creator speak to us, give us instructions. So we postulate that the creator endowed us with the SAME abilities, and a connection to the creator. Those thoughts, connections and instructions are unverifiable, but also un-falsifiable.
What if the original cause is beyond our understanding? What if those instructions are all in our heads and the result of seemingly disconnect thoughts coming from our own chemistry? Since anything we think is within the frame work of our understanding, anything we can postulate, think or imagine could automatically be what the original cause is NOT. Maybe the ORIGINAL CAUSE is by its nature beyond our understanding. Can you understanding a larger picture when you are a part of it? In other words, can "you" stop being "you" even for a second?
More Comments. The idea that there must be a 'beginning' of a chain of events implies "time". Time exists only within the framework of 'our' universe. Before there was something, was there nothing?
If this universe (including time) was created from 'nothing', by definition, the ORIGINAL CAUSE must be outside of that. This is subject to our idea of "beginning" because beginning automatically implies a starting point in time, which as I just stated only exists within the framework of what we know, and this universe.
I know its a lot to digest. but this is what I think about.
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Monday, November 7, 2011
So two days after my Ozark DNF, I am putting some reflection on it. First, I am 99% sure I would have made it with no repercussions. However, it was that 1% that stopped me, because of the ramifications of that 1%.
Ir-repairable harm to my heart, and/or forever ending my running career. Forget about DEATH, I was worried about LIVING with a really bad decision; and maybe still DNF'ing just at a later time. My heart was BLIPPING an extra beat about every 5 minutes. Its a feeling like your drummer is out of syncopation. I have had it before; its a sign of over-training and too much stress (work this time).
I had a chance to think long and hard about while I was running that last 10 miles. For two and a half hours, I dissected my logic to drop. I tried to take out whatever pain I was feeling; which was about none, actually. I have felt much worse on three of my four 50 milers. My legs felt great, sort of like they had about 20 miles on them; energy level was through the roof; I had managed my nutrition better than I have ever done. I could have 'mailed in' another 10 or so to make it to total of 50 miles, but you can't do that with a hundred miler.
Logic simply said to weigh the cost-benefit, the risk-reward of continuing onward.
And the risk, however small was too great, too big of a price to pay if my decision to continue turned out to be the wrong one. As an ultra runner, like most, I am my own best doctor. That holds true ONLY when I can be objective about my decisions not being colored by my desires. I had a desire to run 100 miles, and I had to take that out of the equation when I made my choice. Then it became easy.
DO NO HARM.
Do no harm does not equate to inaction, meaning do nothing. The choice to STOP is an action, not inaction. Logically speaking, I had to choose, there was not a "no choice, no action" option in this case.
This does not mean I am not disappointed. On the contrary. Now, I've got a pebble in my shoe. Just like when I DNF'd my first 50, it gave me the resolve and drive and commitment to do what it takes to get it done.
I am definitely not done with the HUNDO. Not even close.
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Its been called “The Mother Road”, officially “The Will Rogers Highway”, “Main Street of America”, and finally “The Most Famous Road in the World”.
From 1926 to 1985, that iconic road existed from Chicago to Los Angeles. Named Route 66. It was an idea, a collection of roads, and to travel it was to travel for the journey as much as the destination.
So this weekend, I’ll take the vapor trail of the Route 66 past St Louis, into a rural area south called Steelville, MO. I’ll have the honor of wearing the number 66 in my attempt at 100 miles. 102, to be more specific.
How to prepare for a journey longer than any other you’ve taken? One mile at a time, one Aid Station at a time. Remembering first, its about the journey, and not the destination.
Frankly, there have been times and days recently when I believed I just wanted to say I’ve run a hundred miles, not that I actually wanted to do it. I wanted to get there, and wear the mantle.
But that’s just ego talking. You can’t run a hundred miles by being impatient; by trying to be there, instead of here.
I really want to run a hundred miles, not say I’ve run a hundred miles.
Route 66, it was about the journey. The diners, the roadside attractions, the miles, each one holding the promise of something new and exciting. Watching the miles go by from the back seat of a station wagon when I was 10 years old, I didn’t want to be anywhere but right there, at that moment.
Fields of corn and wheat zipped by, gas station soda pop from a clear bottle. Red and orange and yellow. A jack knife from an old Indians road side store. I still have it.
So one hundred miles. I don’t know if I can do it, I don’t know what will happen. But I’ll give it my best shot. Always do.
A travelin’ man,
Knows ease and speed,
He carries with
All he needs
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
|Aid Station||Miles into race||Next Seg Dist||Total T||Segment T||Cut-off Time||Clock reads:|
|Grasshopper Hollow||8||9.6||2:08||2:33||8:08 AM|
|Sutton Bluff (1)*||17.6||5.2||4:41||1:23||11:30 AM||10:41 AM|
|Stillwell Hollow||22.8||5.2||6:04||1:23||12:45 PM||12:04 PM|
|Johnson Hollow||28||6.8||7:28||1:48||2:30 PM||1:28 PM|
|Gunstock Hollow (2)||34.8||8.7||9:16||2:19||4:15 PM||3:16 PM|
|Brooks Creek (3)*||43.5||7.5||11:36||2:00||6:30 PM||5:36 PM|
|Highway DD (4)||51||8.2||13:36||2:35||9:00 PM||7:36 PM|
|Martin Road||59.2||9.3||16:11||2:56||11:45 PM||10:11 PM|
|Hazel Creek (5)*||68.5||7||19:08||2:13||3:00 AM||1:08 AM|
|Machell Hollow||76.1||5.4||21:21||1:42||5:30 AM||3:21 AM|
|Berryman campground (6)*||81.5||6.5||23:04||2:03||7:30 AM||5:04 AM|
|Billy’s Branch||88||7||25:07||2:13||10:00 AM||7:07 AM|
|Henpeck Hollow (7)*||95||7||27:20||2:13||12:00 PM||9:20 AM|
|Finish – Bass RR||102||0||29:33||0||2:00 PM||11:33 AM|
|First half pace 16|
|Second half pace 19|
|Numbers are Drop bag locations|
|Asterisks are Crew Access|